A unicorn, using a pointy rib as a horn and charging forward, or a satyr playing a flute made of… yeah, you guessed it. It’d snatch bones from the ground to change what it looked like, adding limbs, ribs, and pelvises to turn into other various (boned) mythological creatures. What attacks they’d have: Bowling skulls like someone out of The Big Lebowski wouldn’t be enough for this skeleton. So there’d be skeletons with eight legs like a spider, or a game of piggy-in-the-middle going on with a poor sod’s skull being chucked back and forth. Or maybe not, because by the looks of it the bones have got muddled up. What their level would look like: A graveyard. How about a jukebox that spits out vinyl records? Or a set of drums that project sentient musical notes? Bonus points if Cuphead jumps to the musical rhythm to unleash an almighty combo cabaret attack. What attacks they’d have: Obviously those long legs would be used to kick over large distances, and it’d be a crime against music if he wasn’t able to transform into various objects. Behind him would be other dancing apparitions, with a disco ball high above whose coloured lights would shine through the jivers. What their level would look like: Another rotoscoped dancer, this ghost is certainly no longer of the material world, or his leg bones would be protesting rather strongly. Just don’t ask where those bits of glittering gold have been. If only our hero had a clipper as a special attack… he’d have to jump over the beard and avoid the treasure the hermit pulls out from under his raggedy tunic and throws your way. What attacks they’d have: Considering it’s prehensile (basically meaning it can grab and move like a hairy tentacle), you can bet his beard is going to be snaking its way towards Cuphead. As he’s got a hideout in a cave there would be treasure and various other giants’ skulls strung up behind him, like you can see in the gif. A very long, prehensile beard at that - but I’ll get onto that later. What their level would look like: This creep is basically a giant with a beard and some missing teeth. Read more: The 25 best indie games of all time (opens in new tab) 5. The one with the hat would use its headwear like a boomerang, all while firing out chickens from the doors and having the barn jump around on its stubby little legs to try and squish Cuphead. What attacks they’d have: Like the hydra that grew two heads whenever one was cut off, each head emerging from the barn would multiply, with each one having its own attacks. Tractors have teeth instead of grills, cows walk on their hind legs, and all the crops prance around. So I’m thinking some poor farmer bought land but he wasn’t told it was an ancient burial ground, and all his things began to be possessed. What their level would look like: God, I don’t want to imagine what farm this building came from. Hot wax falling from the sky would need to be dodged, plus you have to try and avoid the initiation rituals… in the full-length cartoon that involves its main character dodging blades with teeth. I’m imagining it’d fire lit candles Cuphead’s way, culminating in a massive flamethrower attack. What attacks they’d have: Obviously the whole head-on-fire thing would be a gamechanger. What their level would look like: Figures in dark robes would be swaying from side to side, with flaming braziers at either end. Or deadly force, depending on your point of view. Don’t think I haven’t noticed how bulbous that belly is either… the final form could have the tummy unzipped to reveal it’s being piloted by a seal bouncing a rubber ball, which would be fired at you with intense enthusiasm. I bet the tusks would detach and fire out torpedoes too. What attacks they’d have: An almighty bodyslam wouldn’t go amiss, nor would throwing copious amounts of fish and possibly the odd unlucky chap whose job it is to feed the seals.
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